My life has fallen to pieces in the past few weeks. If you read my previous post you know my Mum had a stroke and has been blighted by Bell’s Palsy. Her recovery has been greatly hampered by the fact that her ear is now very infected (apparently this can be a side effect of the Bell’s Palsy) and she is having violent headaches on top of everything else.
I am doing my best to shore her up but I have some serious health issues that have cropped up in my own life. My son has tested positive for Covid this week, on top of having a kidney infection from a kidney that only operates at 13% anyway. It is wreaking havoc with his whole system. He is struggling with his mental health as a result of constantly feeling ill, which is no surprise really. Who wouldn’t? His determination to always be positive no matter what, is crumbling around the edges. Currently his attitude is, ‘What’s the point? If I stay positive or feel shit, I’m just going to be ill again anyway. I may as well just sit here and vegetate. No hope is better than having hope taken away every time.’
I don’t know how to fight that, I don’t know how to help him. My heart hurts for him so bad right now, but there is absolutely nothing I can do to change his circumstances or his health.
My own health is suffering greatly, I am currently wearing a heart monitor after having some rather severe palpitations and chest pains, I have put them down to stress but the cardio people want readings for a month to see what is going on.
I went for my 5 year Breast test exam two weeks ago and this week I received a call back letter telling me they have to run more tests and they want me to be aware that the tests will take most of the afternoon to complete on the day of my appointment. That sounds really fucking scary quite frankly and I feel like I am staring down the barrel of the breast cancer gun right now and playing russian roulette with it.
Add to that my physical health is not the best, osteoarthritis has set in to most of my joints and my doctor is looking to see if there is any rheumatoid arthritis present as well. I already have gout, so if the rheumatoid arthritis shows up too then I have the hat trick of all three of them.
Tom had Covid and it wiped the floor with him, he is currently recovering 267 or so miles away but he is not fit to travel and come home.
My whole family is ill, my own health is a huge question mark right now and I can’t see a bright spot anywhere. I’m going on the silent list for the foreseeable. I highly doubt that, unless there is some good news, I will be posting anything at all.
Stay well people, look after each other and be kind to those who are struggling, I will return when I have some positive news to share.
6 thoughts on “There is no good News Anywhere in Gem’s World.”
Hope that some good fortune finds its way to you soon. 😡
Keeping you and yours in my thoughts and prayers.
I am so sorry it is coming at you from all sides, my beautiful friend. I am sending all the positives vibes and light that I can across that great big pond… hoping it reaches you, and brings you some comfort. I will be praying for all of you…your son, your mom, Tom, and you…the glue of your family unit. Lots of love, Gemma. Write me any time. Hugs, love, and more hugs ❤
If I won the lotto last night I am getting my emergency passport and I am coming to take care of you. You can try to put me off and lock me out but I will stand outside rain or shine calling your name pleading and wheedling, making all sorts of racket until either the neighbors have me arrested or you relent and let me in. However if I am standing on your property making all the noise can they still arrest me? I will caw like the seagulls. Croak like frogs. Sing all the silly songs I can make up to see you smile. You have a lot of worries and I know you like to carry them all around alone because well that is who Gem is. However you never had a bossy little sister who is pushy and will show up even if you tell her to go home.
Again though this scenerio is only working if I won the lotto.
If I have not I will amuse you and tease you and make you smile against your will with my written words to you.
Love you sis and btw you are not allowed to leave me. I need you still yet.
Love you to pieces and I am always here for you. )
My heart is with you dear Gemma.
I think and hope that when spring comes, everything will be a little better.
Sending love and prayers that everyone starts to get better real soon. Please be good to yourself