Just when I thought it was safe to go back in the water… this happened.
As a few of you will be aware, I’ve been missing in action for a good while now. My life has a habit of blowing up in my face when I least expect it to. Either I have been ill or more importantly my son has been ill. I run my mum and dad’s business from my home and manage all the admin from here so that they can be elderly and spend their hard earned income and generally kick their heels up and not have the pressure. I am also a commissioned mosaic artist and a writer in my spare 5 minutes when I’m not being a full time carer for my son and doing all of the above which roughly translates to, I have no spare time right now. So, narcissists are most definitely at the top of my ‘Fuck off’ list and I want nothing to do with them.
However, they have a nasty habit of turning back up like a bad penny when you least expect it. In my opinion, my favourite punishment method of Spanking should be made mandatory for all narcissists! They would definitely think twice before trying to crawl out from under their stones if they knew they could expect a sound spanking every time they appeared!
So, this is where my narcissist pops up. 9 years ago, a woman who was considered by me as a close friend did the unthinkable and she tried to initiate online sex with Tom. Tom obviously came to me and told me about it with a ‘what the actual fuck is going on with this woman?’ tone to his voice. He was furious at her for trying to compromise him in the first place but he was even more furious that she thought he would go for it with her. Needless to say, I cut her off at the knees and we have never spoken for 7 years. Prior to this unthinkable act taking place, she had gifted me an emerald and diamond ring that I really didn’t want from her but she forced it on me by posting the damn thing to my home. It has lived inside my jewellery case, never seeing the light of day, for all of that time until she reared her ugly head two years ago asking for it back. (Apparently she had realised that it was valuable.)
I dealt with the matter by telling her that I would post it to her, she insisted she wanted to turn up at my home and collect it and we came to a Mexican stand off until I informed her she would be arrested for stalking if she came within 200 feet of my front door. (She has a history of stalking, just sayin’. She’s a proper nutcase, not a pretend one.)
Then Covid happened at us all and we were in lock down. Whoop! Anyway, that was the time I decided to try and die (literally not figuratively) with sepsis and a kidney behaving badly. She contacted me once again via Facebook messenger to say she would come over and look after my son while I was in hospital. After swearing profusely at the sheer audacity of this woman, I then realised that I could use Covid lockdown to my advantage. No travel, no visitors, no contact. No mental ex friend moving in to my home while I was stuck in hospital. She disappeared again, I thought we were done, except for the ring of course. She would not provide me with her current address. She moves home frequently, not sure why, she just never seems to stay at the same house for longer than a year or two. I still had the ring. Maybe it had all just been a ploy for her to get her foot back in the door? Who knew? Not me for sure. Meh… it didn’t matter, she was gone, I had other problems, Tom shaped problems as you will recall and I was busy.
Now, fast forward to this week. My Facebook messenger pinged me with a notification that wasn’t Jaylyn shaped, (my online adopted Sis) and I curiously opened messenger to see who had dared to contact me. I have been incommunicado for some weeks now due to my son being ill.
Of course it was her, she does have a name, but I don’t want to see it so she is just ‘that woman’. It went like this, ‘Hi hun, xx Can we talk? I still need my ring back, can I come over and collect it? xx’
Needless to say the answer was the same as previously given, address or no ring. End of.
Now she bleated and whined and coerced and manipulated for a few comments and then I opened up a can of whoop ass on her sorry arse. You know when someone has upset you, hurt your feelings and generally become a right royal pain in the ass and you don’t say any of it to them you just politely walk away and shut the door on that shit?
I had already tried that shit, it didn’t work. I reverted to my default setting of blunt ugly truth telling with no holds barred. I was done, cooked and totally fucked off with this woman and everything that was connected to her. I gave it her both barrels blazing and left no stone unturned in my list of reasons why I never wanted to even speak to her again, let alone see her. I ended it with ‘address or no ring and I will sell the fucking thing to get rid of it.’
Her address promptly appeared.
I sent the ring, I thought we were done. I deleted her access to me on messenger. SHE CONTACTED MY SON!!
Fuck me, I saw every shade of red in a nanosecond and I wanted to commit murder! Then I remembered! She’s a narcissist! She won’t go away the conventional way. She had come back to tell me I had hurt her too, I had said she was a drama queen and pathetic. Pathetic is not a word I would usually use to describe someone like this but I guess it might fit. Regardless, I hadn’t said it, but I didn’t take the bait, instead I agreed with her and said yes she was, to both. Guilty as charged.
She told me she loved me and held no malice towards me and she would love me forever because I had been such a good friend to her for all those years. Apparently, sorry isn’t in her vocabulary. She never apologised for trying to get it on with Tom. Not once.
Fucking narcissists are a nightmare to deal with and almost impossible to shake off. Be aware peeps! Don’t fall into their trap, it’s like falling down Alice’s fucking rabbit hole! Who knows where you will end up??
Anyway, I might be back, we shall see…